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FIRST TIME STUNG BY A BEE!

I knew I should’ve resisted the urge for that Cold Stone chocolate shake and kept my ass at home.  But it was Sunday (a day where I eat whatever and however I want), hot, and I looked forward to this treat all week.

Fortunately for me, it’s walking distance so I figured I’d just walk over and burn some calories with all of the calories I was about to take in with that shake.  It’s Florida so there are bugs everywhere, especially bees and wasps.  But throughout the years, I’ve always lucked out so it didn’t really bother me.

As hot as it was, I felt cool in the loose fitting flowy dress I had on.  Got my shake.  Yes!  I should wait until I get home to bus’ this down.  Fuck that, I thought as I walked and drank my shake.  I got back home, finished what was left, and fell into my couch.  My friend calls me and we’re on the phone choppin’ it up while I turn on the TV.

Out of nowhere, a sharp burning pain hit the top of my foot.  It felt as if someone decided to out their cigarette on it.  Without even looking, I started wildin’ out, kicking my feet because I knew something had to have bit me and I wanted it off and dead.  Sure enough, I saw the little fucker fluttering on my living room floor, slowly dying.  I lifted my dress to inspect my foot and that’s when I saw part of the stinger sticking out.  The pain began to intensify.  I didn’t care, I grabbed my foot and started to squeeze the shit out of where the stinger was until I squeezed it right out.  As soon as it came out, the pain subsided.

Thank God I didn’t get the full sting due to my wild instinctual reaction (which was hell a funny if you were there). If my little half sting experience felt like that, I don’t want to ever feel that shit full force, or worse yet a sting from a friggin’ wasp!

Bottom line – if I hadn’t went for that damn shake, that bee wouldn’t have hitched a ride on my dress and made its way into my home.  I should’ve resisted the temptation!

Check out my latest vlog below and thanks for visiting Meeshmoves!  Like, comment, follow!

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New Place, New Life – FLORIDA!

I never thought I would have ever been brave enough to take this step, but sometimes life can force you to do things out of your comfort zone, in order to get you on the path where you need to be.

This has been the biggest leap of faith I’ve ever taken.  I mean, I picked up and moved somewhere that I knew nothing about, where I knew no one, and hit the reset button on my life.

So how has it worked out?  Too soon to tell.  I live in an area called Lakeland and so far –  I absolutely love where I live!  It’s quiet, I have a beautiful view of forestry, and pleasant neighbors.  There’s nothing more relaxing than sitting on my balcony with my hookah, glass of wine, and my computer.  There’s also an awesome recreation area with billiard’s, a pool area with cabanas, and a cozy firepit.  Did I mention that I live amongst the nice restaurants and shopping?.  I mean I literally walk across the parking lot and I’m there – including the IMAX movie theatre.

Another thing I love about this place are the trails!  If you’re ever in Lakeland, you have to check out Circle B Bar Reserve (I’ll do a separate post on this one).  They have a bunch of cool trails.  I mean you’re sometimes mere steps from an alligator just laid out on the side, chillin’.

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Now where I am is considered mid-Florida.  I’m more located inland, so when I want a little beach vibe, I head west to St. Petersburg or Clearwater and hang out along the gulf.  If I want even more action I can head east to Orlando.  I’m literally right in the middle!

Even though I don’t know if Lakeland is somewhere I’ll permanently call home, it’s surely in the running!

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DATING: ASSUMPTION VS. TRANSPARENCY

Now that I’m once again a single woman, at some point dating will become my new normal.  Not quite ready yet, but it will be eventually.  After some interesting conversations with individuals from both sexes, I was left with some interesting perspective on how some approach what they want as far as dating and relationships.

ASSUMPTION

For me, this has got to be the riskiest way to approach dating – if you are dating with a purpose.  From personal experience I’ve learned to never assume anyone’s intentions.  While in your mind you may think it’s going one way, it could very much well be the opposite for the other person.  I was told the other day from an admirer who has apparently been an admirer for some time, that he got approved to transfer from NYC to Atlanta and recently moved.  What threw me off was that he stated the only reason he did that was because I moved to Atlanta and now that he’s actually there I now live in Florida, and that “he’s not chasing me anywhere else”. Wait – what?  Dude, I didn’t even know you were checkin’ for me like that!  Not to say that I wouldn’t still do me and moved anyway, but ain’t nobody psychic around here.  We’ve never even had that kind of discussion much less.  If we did, then he would’ve known not to waste his time doing anything in his life based on what I’m doing.  Perfect  example of when assuming isn’t always favorable.  But I wish him all the best.

TRANSPARENCY

In my opinion, this is the best deal.  Tell me straight up from the beginning what it is, or what it isn’t.  That way I’ll know if we are on the same page, and we can decide how or if we want to go forward from there.  It can either lead to a dark place or a beautiful one, but I feel it’s better to be honest and straightforward.  Depending on the situation, if you decide to involve yourself, it was your decision to go there as opposed to being led on or better yet assume something is what it isn’t.

Communication is key when dating just as it is in a relationship. If you can’t properly communicate what you want or don’t want while at the dating stage, you can’t expect much from a relationship – if you ever get there.

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YAWD TALK: WHEN DI OWNER FI DI MAN A HIM MUMMA

 

 

I was born in America but I have a strong Jamaican background and grew up in that culture, even living there for a few years.  Today when they say “di owner fi di man”, it usually means his wife or “wifey”.  In the case of my ex-husband, it’s his mama.

I guess growing up and seeing my dad’s mom and my mother get along so well, I could not for the life of me understand my former mother-in-law’s dislike for me.  For the first three years of marriage, everything was all good.  I noticed little things but I chalked it up to my then husband as being a straight momma’s boy, which I didn’t mind.  But I didn’t understand the difference between having respect for his mother and having a straight obsession which in turn made him a puppet.

That third year of marriage is what opened my eyes to the problem.  Marrying me, he was able to become a legal permanent resident and after that 3-year period of having to stay married to a citizen had passed, mama showed her ass!  We went to Jamaica to spend Christmas and New Years with his family and that ended up being the worst trip I had ever been on in my life. She went out of her way to make me uncomfortable as a guest in her house, instigating arguments between my then husband and I, and he played right into it. It had gotten so bad that I ended up leaving their house and my husband, and went to stay with my father and family who I had there. Thank God I had that option! After that I never stepped foot back in that yard which was back in 2011.

All of it made me reflect and realize some things.  I was the third woman he had ever lived with and second marriage for him.  It never dawned on me until then that she never had anything good to say about any woman he had ever been with and the same with his older brother (who was separated from his wife and went back to living at home with mama).  I noticed that every time we were around her we would get into a big argument over something she would say or bring up.  I realized that although I was his wife, I would never be a priority over his mother and he would never demand any kind of respect for me due to this obsession.  Her power over him was STRONG.  I mean hell, we lived in separate fucking countries, thousands of miles away, and he was still her puppet!

Her lack of respect for me is what ultimately led to our demise as I am no pushover nor do I hold my mouth to people who are disrespectful towards me.  I don’t care who it is, or how old they are.  Especially when I had a husband who never came to my defense and just let shit happen all because according to him “she’s old and not gonna change”.  Especially when my mother treated him like she gave birth to him and always respected our marriage.  Lastly, especially when I was quick to defend him to people in my own family and would not allow him to be disrespected by anyone.

All of this to say that I learned that although he had women before me, during our marriage, and now after divorce, di owner fi di man a him mumma.  That’s the only woman for him.

Look out for my second book coming soon titled Love, Marriage, Dishonor, Hate.  Thanks for visiting Meeshmoves!

 

THE POWER OF THE TONGUE

First off get your mind out of the gutter!  I’m about to get into the meaning of the title – but it’s not that! LOLL!!  All jokes aside though, I’ve seen in life where words out of one’s mouth has brought success, sadness, trouble, and tragedy.  Not a lot of us think about that when we say things.  I mean we’re all human!  Sometimes shit just comes out.

I have many moods and depending on the mood, I can say positive things or sometimes I can talk some reckless shit.  Either way, it’s realizing the power of your tongue with regards to your life that signifies growth, and I’m getting to that point of realization.

I’ve come to learn that no matter how angry I get, remaining positive and speaking positivity into my life actually does bring good things, which far outweighs being negative and salty.  I’ve been in that place of constantly speaking negativity and that was all I ever encountered.  I’ve also realized that no matter how much I lash out or curse people out that upset me, it doesn’t make me feel better inside.

In the heat of the moment, I sometimes can’t help my reaction to certain things – especially having a hot head – but I know I feel good when I ignore things that bring me no joy.

Don’t let your tongue hinder you from happiness.  Be positive, be happy.  Speak it into existence and watch life take a different turn!  Slowly but surely I’m starting to see that with mine.

Thanks for visiting Meeshmoves!  Don’t forget to check out my vlogs on the Meeshmoves YouTube channel!  Like and subscribe!

 

 

 

 

WHEN IT’S TIME TO GO: THIRTIES TRANSITIONS

In life, we all have a moment where we want to just “GO”.  It could be a job, a relationship, friends, family, or a change in environment.   But when that want becomes a need, sometimes you just have to do it.

Most of us have that moment in our thirties.  They say as a humans, we start life transitions around that age.  I feel like that’s definitely a fact.  All of my life transitions happened in my thirties.

It started with my circle.  Family that I grew up with had to become strangers, and friendships that drifted a part had to be let go.  It was all a part of the process.

Next came my marriage.  I got married in my twenties.  Who I became in my thirties was not the same person, and that was hard to accept by my then husband, which I feel contributed to the downfall of that relationship.

Then the J-O-B.  Initially I saw myself climbing up the career ladder and really go places within the company.  My then boss sold me a good con when he asked me to come back and work with him.  Not a lot of people could work with him due to his unfiltered mouth when it came to certain things that should not be discussed in the workplace such as POLITICS.

He is a hardline republican (should say it all) and would say things that I would chalk up to him babbling shit but to others it was intolerable.  I started working there the same year I got married and I had a good salary so I only gave a shit about stacking my money and making moves.  Therefore I didn’t take a lot of his shit seriously, and once you voiced up to him he would calm down and stop talking whatever shit he was talking about.

And then what I dub “The Trump Effect” took place after the 2016 elections, and he just became unbridled with the racist and demeaning comments.  I don’t know if it’s the times, or if it’s me growing (this whole thirties transition thing) AKA getting old, but I became unable to tolerate his mouth and began to take his ass on.  Then I would give him this disgusting attitude sometimes unintentionally, but I didn’t care nonetheless.  I mean I would come into the office in a good mood and then as soon as he got in I would turn sour.  I had to take a step back and ask myself; is this the life that’s going to give you what you want?  Hell no!

I got my real estate license and began doing that as my side hustle.  I never hid that from the company as in this business, the more you can get your name out there the better.  Now he asked me to do something when taking rental applications that I as a licensed agent could not do as it is considered discrimination.  The company did not pay for me to get my shit and I have morals about me so I was not about to risk it.

Said boss rejected a good rental application and while going over it with the applicants, they inquired about buying and I gave them my business card.  Fast forward a few months later and I get them a house.  When I told him about it, he had a look of envy in his face and asks me – after over 10 years of working with me and knowing my work ethic – “are you doing this real estate business on company time?”  I said “excuse me?” and then I chuckled and calmly said “no.”  Meanwhile, all he did on “company time” was play Trump speeches blaring from his computer for the entire office to hear, runs home everyday for a few hours to do whatever, and constantly interrupting staff while they are working to talk about movies and politics.

The next day I gave in my resignation and was out of there!  There was never any intention of moving me from the position that I was in which was under him, and the minute he saw I was doing bigger things of my own accord, it seemed to piss him off AKA hatin’.

Now I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off of my shoulders.  Although I took a leap of faith and left New York altogether, I no longer have that feeling of fear before I let it all go.  I feel excited about the unknown.  Plus I set myself up so that I can make moves in my new state and got my GA real estate license, did some networking and met the right people to help me get to where I need to be.  All of this I did ahead of time so don’t feel like I didn’t strategize my shit.  Once I made up my mind I did what I had to do to make sure I’m good.

So my point?  When it’s time to go, chuck up the deuces and GO!

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WEDNESDAY WISDOM: DIVORCE CAN BE LIKE A DEATH

Divorce stories are countless.  Whether it had to do with infidelity, disrespect, abuse, etc., when it actually happens, the loss you feel can be as if someone died.  I won’t act like it wasn’t the best decision for me, but after ten years in a marriage, the shit still hurts.

I don’t know about anyone else, but I never married with the intention of getting divorced, and no one should.  My plan was to build a life with that person.  So when I had to make that decision to walk away, it was gut-wrenching – but necessary.

It’s not something to be taken lightly, and should be exercised only if there is no other solution and nothing else works.  If your union is strong enough to withstand the outside factors – or “sharks” as I heard a pastor refer to them as – treasure that unbreakable bond.

If you have to take that step to divorce, you will mourn the marriage, no matter how bad it was.  But it’s ok, it’s a part of the process!  Eventually you’ll get back to you!

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LONDON IN PICS

This trip was so spur of the moment.  I decided and planned to go for my birthday, which was only two weeks away.  I was going through a lot in my personal life and I needed to just get away.  After checking in with my cousin to see if I could crash at his place and getting confirmation, I went on British Airways and didn’t think twice about buying that ticket.

It was the best decision!  It was an amazing ten days and I was finally able to add England to my list of traveled places, and I can also now say that I’ve been to that side of the world.  Lol!  Small thing for some folks but big for me as I usually only go to the Caribbean when I say I’m going overseas.  My travel list isn’t all that long yet, but with my new outlook on life, it will be!

Being that I had never been there prior and I was traveling by myself, I took some necessary steps prior to my departure that I would advise to everyone.  First off, I have a  shitty mobile phone.  It is a galaxy s6 edge plus and also the worst phone I’ve ever had, but with the money I paid for it, I have to make this shit work.  If someone calls me it goes to voicemail and when I try I have to do it like three times before it actually connects.  BUT, I can receive and make calls via WhatsApp, Facebook, and other wifi/data apps with no issue.  So I went online and found a site called visitbritainshop.com.  On this site I put in an order to rent a mobile wifi device which I would pick up at my terminal when I got to Heathrow.  I had to make sure I was able to call and receive calls at all times.  That and I wanted the same internet capabilities I had back home to share every special moment as they happened!

Although I got my device when I got to Heathrow, the site was not specific in stating that the name of the location where I was to pick it up in the airport was called “excess baggage point” as opposed to anything that said “visit great Britain shop”.  I had to ask different airport workers who pointed me in different directions until I got to an airport worker that actually knew what I was asking for.  I picked it up and made my way.  VERY IMPORTANT – I booked it until the day that I was leaving and I had to be return it in all of the packaging at the airport at my departure terminal.  If you forget, you’ll get a high penalty fee and other penalties until it is returned to the vendor.

I stayed in Hammersmith which I learned was in West London.  First thing’s first, get my oyster card!

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Just like how we have metro cards in NYC, they have this.  So I got mine and hit dem streets!

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You know I took my ass to the top in the front right?  I had to do it!  And the driver kept riding the damn sidewalk, which looked and felt crazy from up there!  But it was fun!

I had to go check out Brixton, without a doubt.  I always heard it was like East New York and with my Caribbean background, I wanted to see.  And it is – to me.  And just like Brooklyn, gentrification is happening there as well.

 

Almost everyone that goes to England flock to Buckingham Palace, Windsor Castle, the London Eye, etc.  Not saying that all that isn’t great to see if you never have,  but for some reason I was more interested in seeing rural England.  Could be my Game of Thrones obsession (I know it isn’t all filmed there).  Anyway, first stop – Stonehenge!  That day they were about to have that solstice festival thing so I’m thinking that’s the reason it’s roped off as I thought I’d be able to walk up in there and take some pics.  But I got shut all the way down!  Still got some good ones though!

 

Next was Bath, England.  I had to check out the roman baths.  It was fascinating, but the pool in the picture was the only one that had much water in it.  The others were mostly dried up or had a little trickle.  But I was glad I went nonetheless.

I had fish and chips across from the museum at this restaurant called The Roman Baths Kitchen.  It had comfortable outdoor seating so I went.  I’ll be honest, I did not enjoy it.  As soon as I cut the fish, the oil just started leaking out of it.  I must have had two chips and said forget about it!

Last stop of the tour was in Stratford-upon-Avon AKA Shakespeare town.  The group I was with was given a tour of his school with a little trip back in time as we went to a pretend class to experience school life during that era.  Interesting!

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The tour also went through an area called The Cotswolds where the houses were built with this Cotswold of stone with a certain kind of pattern.  The tour was a drive through only so even though it was charming and pretty, I didn’t get any pics as I fell asleep and caught a glimpse as we were leaving.   I saw these sights all in one day.  I booked the “England in a Day” tour with Premium Tours and met at the meet up point which was at Victoria Station.  Coming back they let me off close to where I was staying and I took and from there I took an Uber home.

The rest of my time was spent enjoying quality time with my family and indeed I did!  From my cousin who hosted me cooking everyday, my other cousin took me to check out some restaurants (Poppy’s II & Nando’s) and to get a London-style kebab, to going to a Jamaican-style fish fry in this area called Thornton Heath, I ate well!  I’m getting hungry thinking about that shit right now.

There was so much more I wanted to do but time would not allow.  Also I did this trip unexpectedly but the next time – and there definitely will be a next time – I’ll definitely do them.  I want to ride the Eurostar and check out Ireland, Scotland, and Wales.  I also want to do a day trip over to Amsterdam.  The Game of Thrones tour is definitely something I want to do as well. I saw the packages online and it looks exciting!

I have soooo much footage from this trip that I had to break it up.  So in this post you saw some pictures and the next I’ll have the vlog video ready.  You can also check out the pic video below.  Enjoy and thanks for visiting MeeshMoves!

APPLYING CARIBBEAN FINANCE PRACTICES TO REAL ESTATE = BLACK WEALTH

Growing up in a Caribbean household, you become accustomed to certain ways and practices of the culture.  I am of Jamaican descent, and we have a saving practice called a “partner” or “su-su” amongst other islands.

Basically, if you wanted to buy a car, pay bills, or even a house, this is one of the ways to gather the money if you can’t get traditional financing.  How it works is you have a set amount of people – for this example I’ll use ten.  A contribution amount is set and each person has to submit that amount to the designated banker – which is the individual who will hold the pooled funds – until ready for distribution.  For this example I’ll set the figure at $200.  Each week, one person will get the draw which is the entire amount of pooled funds over the next ten weeks (because it’s 10 people).  That’s $2000 for every person that’s in it.

Now that was just an example of how the concept works.  What if we were to apply this concept to acquiring real estate?  What if we not only pooled funds, but pooled credit and income in order to get loans to acquire/develop/rehab commercial & residential real estate and build black empires?

There’s power in numbers and I’m all about building with and for my people!  It just takes that first investment property that can be a tiny little structure which can take us to housing communities, shopping centers, high-rise buildings, etc.  As the old Jamaican proverb says, “every mickle make a muckle”.   In other words, collaboration can make us great!

If you’re interested in more on this, drop me a message and lets talk!  Thanks for visiting Meeshmoves.com!

THAT BUYERS’ AGENT HUSTLE

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Let me tell you, this real estate game is a real hustle, especially in New York.  It has definitely become a sellers’ market here, and offers are competitive.

I recently got my clients offer accepted on a move-in ready house that’s perfect for them, and exactly what they wanted.  BUT, we had to compete with another buyer.  I was in London on a private tour and without my laptop when I got the call from the seller’s agent.  I negotiated the offer and got it accepted, set up the home inspection, and arranged contact with my clients attorney to get the contracts for my clients to sign.

All of this done with just my cell phone, a piece of scrap paper from my bag, and my red lip liner since I had no pen.  When you get into this business, even on vacation the work doesn’t stop.  As an agent, it is my responsibility to give 100% to my clients and I take that seriously.

Word of mouth is one of the best marketing tools in this industry.  It’s important when your clients can relay a positive experience with you as their agent.  That can land a referral right into your hands.

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